20 THINGS I DO FOR MY CHILD’S WELLBEING

Some of you have asked about more parenting advice. While I believe no one has authority to tell you how to raise your child (despite the government and modern cultural sources trying to control that to their best), I do think there are some guidelines especially when comes to having your child to be in tune with the natural, the unrushed, the calm. Nature and children go together no matter how much one might want to pull them apart.

Here are some things I do with my little one, for this or that purpose. Some I elaborate here, others I don’t feel the need to elaborate so much because they should be just the normal. Some things might surprise you, while some might be categorised as ”traditional upbringing”, others are more logical, functional. Are you doing any of these things with your own children or, do you plan to do any of these with them?

20 things we do with and for her:

1. I constantly learn, research, improve myself. While this might take time from what people usually call hobbies, for me this is a passion. Putting time into what I believe is best for us all to me is worth everything. I am not crying out for not having time to… put a mask sheet on or paint my nails or think about fashion or about keeping up with all the news at all times.
2. I prioritise and sort everything in a priority mental list and I learn from that. From people to tasks.
3. I cook from scratch and avoid at all costs restaurants, additives and poorly sourced ingredients.
4. I am available for her 24/7 including nights without waking up my husband. She always asks for me, nonetheless. My husband needs to sleep to perform other duties in order to sustain the family – that needs to be respected and sacrifices from the mother need to be done. Sleep is crucial for a head of the family, good routine and good sleep.
5. I don’t give her plastics and I ask the others to please do not gift her anything with plastics.
6. I take each learning experience easy, I do not push her because society says ‘’she should do this by now’’.
7. We choose nature than city walks, playgrounds, play rooms, etc.
8. I scan her interests and don’t insist on something if she is not interested.
9. I teach her about plastics, natural fibres, wax, foods and bodily functions (why we burp, what is gas, heart beating, why urine is darker and sometimes lighter and what it means, what constipation happens and how to avoid it, why we take probiotics sometimes, why we bleed from a wound, etc)
10. We focus on functional wear and choose only natural fibres for all her clothes instead of obsessing with patterns, colours, themes or seasons etc. She has her favourite colours and it’s fine but it’s not always possible to have those colours and it’s OK.
11. I choose to dress her lower body much better in winter and teach her why she should avoid sitting on cold rocks or cold surfaces to avoid UTIs, reason also why we sometimes supplement with cod liver (as vitamin D takes an important role in UTI prevention). Reason why we don’t use plain sleighs but instead an old fashioned one that has a proper seat above the ground level.
12. I only offer her warm/body temperature drinks in both summer and winter as cold is never really supporting the body (unless in high febrile state).
13. I never choose antibiotics or pharmaceutical remedies as first aid if ever sick. I also avoid talking about drugs in a positive manner and rather we play-role doctor by talking about ‘’healing bone broth’’, honey, mint, teas, acerola, mineral water, minerals, etc. Time will come to tell her the difference and when one might have no remedy than to give in for some medicine.
14. We allow her to play alone, but we get involved only if she wants us. Her imagination is quite wild due to this, she might not like to sit down too much (because she is naturally a high-energy child) but she likes making up situations, playing like that, inventing games, sitting to look at books…
15. She was taught to say ‘’no, stop!’’ when she simply doesn’t want something.
16. At a small age, we avoided introducing ‘’parenting role-playing’’ as it can become stressing despite it being ‘’a role play’’. Is it OK to stress children with tasks that early? Some might see it sweet/cute/feminine – I see it as unnecessary early and stressing. So we did not have babies or small dolls pushing her to ‘’take care’’ of them. First she is a toddler, a child and it’s important that children get that stage in life where everything is about nourishing them, alone, and not asking them to do it back at fragile ages for the fun of it because we find it cute or some might thing ”oh but it’s traditional gender role play!” Yes. It is but not for such fragile ages. This is the time where she learns from me, she understands she is her mamma’s focus, she is my baby and she is the one getting attention. I believe that way, a child, develops better emotional skills and responsibility is to be introduced little by little by simple tasks. When she feels to ask for a dolly or a baby, she will and she will be given it.
17. We talk about spirituality in the way we find best, the gods, the skies, the stars, the Sun, the Moon,… 
18. We do not forbid ‘’sugary things’’, we just do better choices. This means, we do not introduce her to candies, conventional chocolate or conventional pastries. It’s hard in Sweden to explain this to family. We prioritise fruits and she automatically asks for fruits when she has a sweet tooth, whether at home or at grandparents’ house. We do allow her to taste a high-quality, luxurious chocolate or pastry. I use only certain sugars at home focusing on honey.
19. We co-sleep ever since birth and it’s the absolute best thing one can do for their child’s cognitive and emotional development. Also avoids extra stress for mother to go up in the middle of the night to tend, makes it easier to monitor their breathing (as it is incredibly important to close their mouth while sleeping and insist so they breath through their nose and clean it if so needed for them to sleep well), or monitor when feverish or being poorly.
20. We involve her in our work, the brands, we ask her opinion (f.e. she was with us at a whey product tasting!) and we explain things we do so she gets a good understanding of what we do and the role each of us has in the family.

Do not underestimate little ones, they understand more than what you believe, same way, they are affected more by stimuli than what you’d think

For this reason, I grew into certain habits with her, some of the above and many other things that perhaps makes our family ”unique”, us being us. I am not usually a person that is easily influenced by what X or Y says, I like to take my time and overthink things, I do it also when I lack time, which ends up in me being exhausted but ultimately feels so much better being able to take the best decision for us, for our family.

Some might argue some things are not ”trad”, I am and never looked for what others believed it was ”trad”. This term has gained so much weight and so many expectations are behind it that it’s absolutely impossible to satisfy everyone’s understanding of what is ”trad”. I believe my upbringing that was mostly done by my maternal grandparents has helped me to know the limits of what is old-fashioned, better, more natural, versus what’s newly introduced. At the same time, with my parents being more on the ”modern” side (generational curse), I did gather and pick things that I believe the modern line of thought can be helpful, depending on certain situations. So I do not expect for everyone to agree with our ways and that is alright – after all the effort I constantly put every single day of my life to improve myself in knowing whatever that can affect my children, from Medicine to Politics, I know I am doing my absolute max to enable them to live not only a more fulfilling life, but to think for themselves, to have the cognitive force to process, break down thoughts and make decisions that will impact positively their own lives.

Children need freedom, direction but also a firm voice to soothe them and guidance towards The Natural

There are so many hippie voices out there about how to be always extremely gently with children, to the point that we treat them like incapable human beings or small individuals with lower capacity of understanding or decision. Children reach an age where they like to be in charge, it is known to start at around 3 years of age when their brain does an important jump in development. Parents usually feel tired, overwhelmed, out-taken, challenged and they think either 1) restricting their child works 2) not restricting anything and allowing them to ”be wild”. I know it might sound extremely hard, but there is a SWEET MIDDLE SPOT for making this transition easier and every parent should meditate around their child’s soul and behaviour to find this sweet spot. If parents would have more time to get to know their child more, they would also transition toddler stages and important steps in their development with greater ease.

Alas parents nowadays are equally dysregulated, poor sleep, stress, work too much, spend too much time on their social media, phone, with friends, on themselves (instead of focusing on their family and how to optimise their time as a family without outside distractions).

Having a child, being with your child, doesn’t necessarily mean you know them. You need a deeper connection with your child, a connection beyond daily activities and interaction. A connection that only spirituality would provide you with and I can attest that since finding calm within myself and being intentionally more spiritual and caring towards the gods, my goddess, I have gotten to know my child in ways I would’ve never thought before. This is the beauty of Nature and how Nature intended us to be – in touch with what’s above, with us and below.

Did you like this post? Would you want me to talk about childcare more often? Do you have certain topics in your mind that you would want to hear my opinion about? Or are you curious about something we/I do with our little one and why? Ask ahead. Let me know what you think about all this!